Roadside bouquets

Roadside bouquets

a quick call to say I’m ok

And I’m on my way

and I’ll drive it home

this worlds lonely homie

I like my space

I crafted laced and stitched this all together

while the weather kept the storms at bay

and when it didn’t well I weathered them anyway

My heart was born heavy still i float like a feather weight

And I brought the rain with me

brain thrifty

Ive never been the type with taste so picky

give me the shirt that don’t fit me

give me the road and ill still see

the gardens abound

I found bouquets

while I looked at the ground

and give thanks

while say to myself

life found a way

to grow through grit and the rock and the shit

and we can too

endorse endure

eclipse enmesh en mass

enough and more

find and chart courses

divorce this malignant force

that we’re at war with

and absorb this

straight from the source

we’re all wild horses

There’s no such thing as a stable home

There are no demilitarized zones

and you will only find peace

when you can find it alone 


enriched

water to roots like breath to lips

a gift

(CHORUS)

If time it dilates

It vibrates

flummoxed

as I rummage through the tonnage

from pit in my stomach

I’m thinking

Pity

Its nothing on all sides

But pittance from the prince of tides

still every little bit counts

And so I’m

Shoring up soil to make sure this little pit thrives

The cradle of life death fertilized

That’s why I try and be a fungi-

Know we’re all traumatized

Violence is the fruit of a tree well brutalized

And we’re living through some brutal times

Early morning drive

while the gloom’s looming planet wide

I’d

Plant wildflowers watch the streets come alive

roadside bouquets you’re calling muted

staying rooted as a matter of faith

see its a matter of taste

and my palette

is fucking disgusting

rusted, decrepit and crumbling

life in the stone

and the rose

thrown away once done with

a bouquet for me?

Pretty weeds from concrete

the signs are discrete

but me?

Never been accused of such subtlety

amused

but you get confused by the things I do publicly

you’ll never seem to see the pushed in the puddle me

what once was

but now smudged

those are the shapes that I love

because they’re honest

they never

do as they’re told or

as they’re supposed

or bundle it up

and im artist

honestly

I look for this stuff

there are a million different faces of love

but everyone

that ever spoke to me

did so

on the low

out their mouth sideways

while I vibrated in agonized guilt

because I watched all of those flowers killed

not only do people never get them while they’re still smelling

they don’t even notice that they’re there to begin with

(CHORUS)

and I’m

on my way

in my way

live life in excesses

obsessed thinking its blessed to be rich

but never thought of what a blessing is

or how a world might dress it

if your guess was grotesque

well then yes you guessed it

but could you really love the house when the floor is all busted?

could you really love your neighbor

when you’re hearing him cussing for hours about nothing

on end??

or for just acting like a fucking fiend

what do you really think compassion means

folks will say its dumb

until they atrophy

we all go backwards

You cant escape the causalities

imagine actually

thinking that its not that bad????

Fuck apathy

live affably try and laugh

but never act like its all amiable

damsel distressed not careful

get saved by a werewolf

beware savagery

reactive forces with no center of gravity

do not seek truth they seek comfortable

See being vulnerable is incredibly honorable

but hardly ever gets honored

and more often feels awful

we mistake quietly lined up

for responsible and so those left responsible

don’t have the sense to hold their own selves responsible

they are wrong,

you weren’t strong

watching yourself down trodden on

theres nothing wrong

about feeling despondent

sometimes we need to soften up

often

clay just dug ups too tough

and you cant mold it

my favorite bouquets are the ones left living despite the odds

That after all the sabotage to still be counted on

to show the very beauty of the sun they sprouted on

Flesh and Bone

It was a blood rendering 

Of flesh and bone

Benchwarmer who was left alone

Romantic not romantically

Just the type to live in fantasy 

Living out my fantasy 

What a fallacy 

I didn’t have the faculties actually

But theres only one way to know 

So i was never home

Antics and apathy

What a travesty

Earth steadily grabbing me

Do anything she asks of me

Still feel the pull of the gravity

It was a splendored thing

Hushed in tone

All the sacrifice for just a bit of influence

Oh the impedance

Oh the insignificance

Lift that light that you’ve risen in

Only to dim again

I like to score for friends 

And to keep score for them 

Pulling straws

Pulled the shorter end again

Id sure like to the shore to end

But id been walking on this beach 

So long and so far and so on

So im not sure it ends

Its just more and more bends

Like a pressured vein

Scuba dive

Oxidized 

Awful try

Ask me why

Id rather break my own back

Then admit that i dont have a spine

Fuck it im fine ive always been serpintine

Kinda like the suffer

But its sucks to see that in your eyes

Every try

Every light house to lead ships arry 

wrecked at the cliffs edge

Rest for the stiff neck

But only for a second

Then its break neck speed

Every time 

i thread the needle

through the wrinkles in my eyes

Only to see

Im cognizant 

Ugly like a cormorant 

Fuck those dirty birds 

Look trust me 

Im sure that there lovely in some way ok

Just let me have this one today

Run these runny fingers along fencing 

As i walk away  

Stimulating nerve endings

From end to end 

Lending me strength

Its a zen thing

This is sun sending

This is un ending 

This forever bending let never break

Never take less or more

Only what you truly need

Always had some food to eat

had some clothes and

A home somewhere i could shit and eat

I had a job and some money 

Still believe when you seek 

The world is becoming 

The drumbeat

Seen a deadbeat lead

To melancholic frolic through the polish of death

Formaldehyde varnish 

Follow my steps 

Follow your breath

Why they telling you there’ll be nothing left 

This is all blessed 

Fucking alarmists 

Idk where the alarm is 

But theres no waking me

Could never break dream

Ill just dream more lucidly 

Dreams about you and me

with the blood overrunning the streets

It’s a new kinda sheek 

The discrete elite

Dictating diction 

How we speak 

If ever worlds invoke a word police

theyre coming for me

Running to be

Running my mouth

Running amock

Through the muck

With a love of these free

Words of apathy 

What in the worlds happened to me 

See I used to be magic

Now its murdered rabbits 

In my hat

Look at that

Tryna see the world through the backwards

Ravaged, consumption, combustion and plastic

From the great plains rivers mountains and lakes

 to the blood in our veins

Tainted the same

Every action

Equal to opposite 

Im trying to do opposite

To show and not tell 

And to offer it up like some crux of the truth

Look i made this for you

Still been willing to be willing my way 

Inna parade while they masquerade

Pantheistic and ritualistic 

Sayin fuck the riches

Fuck making a damn name 

I just want to see a damn change

Make a difference

shape the world with the words

When i listen

Love lifted

Im gifted so i shifted space

In between the day and night 

When dusk and dawned on 

With the musk of a some rusted trust

my light long gone on me

Logged off on me 

But Im staying awake

Alone in my cave 

The depraved sounds of growling and howling apes

Reflected through the depths

Of the eyes of this mage

Blank page

Holds a sword with a sense of rage

Theres got to be a better way

Oh socrates 

Oh sweet hypocrisies 

Free philosophies of what the worlds often brings

Somthings off with him 

To act like nothings offered to him

I often’d say that id never have a sensei

World had always lent me

Remarkable men 

Time and time again

So much unrest 

And the stress truly built me best

Steady man 

Readily damned through my own hands 

Tryna KO me

It’s like ok me 

I’m perfectly ok

I’m perfect ok 

I can not allow myself to waiver in anyway 

Slapped back 

Back to the back of the void 

So annoyed 

With the way that I choose to deploy 

My righteous voice

But I always come back to it 

Still  keep it for me

Because I wonder if it’s too much to breach

Because honestly I feel like it’s too much for me 

Lets discuss this more

Am i disgusting? Sure

But show me evil and im the first one would rush the door

All your temptations rest in resting with some busty whore

What are you lusting for 

Whats that illustrious lure

I heard the mighty roar

i never be an herbivore 

I need to feed the beast

I raise my hand and peace

But i know that theres no changing me

Fuck logistics 

This the shit that makes me sickest

In the sense that i want riches 

Its only to build what i envision 

The world i want to live   

And to pass on

When i pass on 

So ive passed on a lot

Of happy simples

And im fine with that

Sometimes this life feels like a never ending spinal tap

But im not married to the marrow 

What a narrow vision of living 

Is so much more

Than flesh and bone

Lowlife

Im not afraid of growth

Or festering

I placed all decadent herbs of time in plant potters

I watch them grow past sanguine skin

Through me with the through line

Perching toward a beckoning light creaking through the walls of my apartment

Which is not my apartment

Ive seen walls fall apart which still stand

And spanned ages through the night as one man

And ive been interrupted

Interrupted from the things I have to do behind my eyelids

For a nine to five

Shits a little sick when we cant live to just survive

And ive invested in the truth

behind the soup of suits and atrophy

I know whats back there

I know whats back there in the spaces you call empty

I hold no envy

jealousy doesn’t grow on me like ivy

I am thriving

I am not afraid of darkness by any pitch

Afraid of no itch

Let them crawl around my empty cell with the lights off

I wont even scratch at you

I know all is all life and I am beckoning for the reckoning questioning everything

Wretched

like this restless

I only fear being escorted

Shepherded

Stuck with no roadmap discernable

And no desire to even find one or get back

So get back

My dreams lied to me

The fogs not lifting

And I cant tell if its ever even been there

Sanity is a question of sanity

So if you break it, you buy it

I just want to get the fuck out of this shop

And stop watching matches burn like a keep sake

Ive changed my mood

Ive shifted my perception

But I cant lift the curtain         

So im certain its tortuous

fortune is forced and its birthed upon a new earth

New normal, we’ll call that new world order

Shuffle all insufferable sufferings

With that

Case caste apathy

Chattering Lambs to the slaughter of a faltering altar

When perceptions been so altered

Will we stand hand in hand with fellow man

Or let divisiveness christen a new era

404 error what youre looking for

Is finally missing

at last

Clearly we are witnessing collapse

And that’s a fact

Paranoid by design

So I try not to chime in

Unless im rhyming

Don’t mind me I walk the earth blindly smiling

Like I have some special secret buried deep

Deep deep deep

because im a low life! 

i like to lie low and let life clear my throat 

with the phlegmy remedy of written word to kill my nerves

its mays flight when its done right

im pretty sure there’s no time between these lines and im

Mr never gets nothing done afraid to admit he knows exactly why hes getting no-where

That’s ok

Its natural

Pluck the dead the leaves and move along

Let the wave come over me its over im over me

Filter all aspirations through the silk screen of tradition

And let them scold me for holding my cards

Oh holy holy, ive folded im folding please hold me

Mistakes in the face of a swift grace

Shape shifts the very trace of hate to a safe place

You couldn’t understand

You couldn’t understand me

And there I go, so blissfully unassuming

Yet so sure of my impurities

dreadfully aware of my own magnificence

Or the lack there of

I hear them whispering about me

Even in the silence

Even in the evening when im all by my odd self

Adding all the odds to see the number of times

Healthy connection to divine

Inspired me

Chances are bizarre

And chances are

We are far from a righteous reckoning

Blind all the time to a blinding light

That’s alright one day ill be a savior in my own right

Ill say I did this on my own right

But if you look back on your whole life the new and the old life

You must realize that you never were alone right?

Because when things get real hard

I like to think back on the times

When times were real hard

And be grateful for the people who cared for me

Because I really could of lost me on way

I mean kinda lost me anyway

So there will be days like this

My momma told me there’d be days likes this

But I never listened

Im a low life

(momma said)

Sometimes I wonder what it’d be like to be like me if i was done right

But you only get one life 

I like to make pretend it was the sunlight

but i was never tarnished by the sunlight 

i was just neglectful tried producing all my own light

and really, wasnt that quite bright of me?

we like to say we have a right to life and liberty

right to love and empathy and justice

but do we? i just cant trust it

the longer you start staring at your self reflecting back you 

you realize its a movie and your acting too

ive been reactive too

cracked into 

cracked a few eggs 

to make an omlet

but im letting it go 

at least im trying to

im trying go

go go

looking at my legs 

like im really not even asking you

im telling you im telling you 

you will you will

I fell fell from the from the fells oh to hell 

now im walking by my self

time tilts and wilts and halts the hilted blade of my minds eye

and I

ill turn a blind eye

and I 

well

ill turn a blind eye

because im a low life! 

i like to lie low and let life clear my throat 

with the phlegmy remedy of written word to kill my nerves

its mays flight when its done right

im pretty sure there’s no time between these lines

i feel like a ventriloquist dummy

dummy

I feel like I can feel the risk

Humming humming

No its buzzing

Killer bees

fumbling honey from the hive to keep the queen alive

drones out to die so that the nest survives

all of that life to lay the groundwork

is some profound work

I guess that’s gratitude

all you ever do is ask for food for you

food for thought

how low does man stoop

just to hit the top

snipped and crimped crops

all fertility lost on top soil

atop soil with my bare feet

I can feel the earth surging

Tryna let me know how bad shes hurting

So its important

Destruction in the name of a new birth

For an earth that just keeps beating itself

As if itself was a dead horse

and of course

That is exactly how I am

This is exactly who I am

Im devoted to emotional queries

Clearly

Give me a chance to craft theory

And dance

Let me ring my head around the rows of roses

With rosey cheeks, inebriated upset

With a pocket filled with poiseys

Posing poets take apropos poses

In opposition

To this plague of humanity

With godspeed gods damning

Firewalkers with these

ashes ashes

We all fall down

We all fall down

We all fall down

So its ashes ashes

We all fall down

Nothings out to get me

But this world is so heavy

Dreading the sight

Of toy soldiers at the ready

To brutalize

Tell me where your duty lies

You’ve been stupefied

Stupid

aint it time

we break and remake you

in our image

culture is the piece to make the difference

nows about the time we need to listen

To all of those around the globe without a pot to piss in

with the boot upon their throats of a toxic system

remember rights are what you don’t have to be given

the only right that I know for sure is the right to be living

every right that was ever given was given by earth

not these institutions, not the constitution

that’s just paper in a glass that says the system

which indoctrinates us

saved us, from what?

The very men who made the paper up

Are you forgetting?

Freedom was here already

God didn’t give you a fucking job in the suburbs nerd

That’s absurd

perception obscured through blurred lens

Entire human race is dependant on being

depressed and apathetic

But wont let it go

At least im trying to

Im trying to go go go

But I am solo

Because im a low life

Im a low life

(Get outta here low life scum)

The Poets new Almanac

I talk a lot of hard headed cocky posturing, but i’m really soft and squishy gushy push me im so wishful,so wish me some wishy washy. but watch me, because right now wont even let me in the lobby but these legs which wibbly wobbly be the same one which have brought me from my knees to the heights of trees. a heightened plea, for the greatest to make it. what say it, i know one day ill make it or break it. i have to, never meaning to pass you but been meaning to ask you what grabs you, I slam my hands on my bad mood. Must be a bad moon, steady flow of detestable and questionable eb and flow. cant pin down the load but i know that its heavy though. and yo, god speaks through these relics are you jealous? this a time old tale of time telling, and im one of the riddlers, picture this trickster fixed in the piss poor picture of eternity burning, i been so damn mean while im untangling. i will never be sane again i gave it up for these dreamscapes to eat like cheesecake absorb these freeze frames. stuck in time so they lost there meaning (and) the whole thing changed like seasons. or more like seasoning, these be the reasons for my recently trembling, resembling elephants after me after me dastardly after we finally act to the thrill of the pack where are we at i was so up front but im still in the back. back of your mind with my head up my ass and i actually charted this all on a map. filled up my bag to the best of my craft it was crap. I headed west once the east fell flat. I headed east when the west fell back. Im doing laps, cant relax but i dont need a thing, yea already drunk but would you pour me a drink

So mind your fucking business or ill give you some new business to mind, yea people talking shit all the time. but im not worried about that see ive got mountains to climb i always knew id see the top its just a matter of time and Im just as crazy as you make me out to be but you make me out to be some kind of monster. A monster. this is a mantra, i didnt do this because i want to i did it because ive got you. Made a deal with the world, and i thank her for the offer. even tho so many times she made me feel awful, i toss still. I just hope that by the time i am a fossil, i leave behind a parcel of land and some apostles. i dont need a remake or retake. i tried to see 3 ways, mind body and soul. and its the soul that’ll take that hefty tole. and my mind, well ive got a lot of goals. and ive got a lot of plans laid out but theyve got a lot of holes.

I dont know where to go so im always on the road like jack karouak
But i dont want to be whack as jack karouac
And looking back the way i dealt with all of that
Is spitting out the truth from this poets new almanac

Foolishly im proud of me thats just how the fool is free. being this silly being, means mortgaging more of me morbidly toward the tourists dream, wont you show me everything. every town center and every setting then down at the thought of settling, down at the thought of loose ends never ends i cant even just pretend. used to feel i was on the fence i just feel now i was never in. saying shit that i never meant. damn my head is choken and broken i hold this rope and imma never let go. hes a dope hes joke hes the road less traveled by a rival unraveled throw me a paddle or some meat for this old dog, treat me like your pavlov, closed off like padlock. thats a little trick for my sick thoughts down the drain, life is only love in pain, worse is feeling in between id rather be burned to feel nothing,

and dear oh dear oh dear oh dear
and dear oh dear oh dear oh dear and i dont think its endearing, i thought i saw top but i just got past the clearing its clear there’s never been a ceiling and sealing all of my feeling from reeling is really stealing. had the chance to express a thought lost art is crime as stated, made it federal. wait until im on that pedestal ill do everything that i said i willl. Picking my bulging brain i refrain because i heard something. Thought i might slip from the trippin but im still me man and im just the same, smitten for my written words to bring me some change. If i stay in my lane and keep my head in the game then im playing(plain). color out the lines or youve never created anything. guess i need some medicine maybe acetaminophen, because i feel it in my belly and head again im sweatin and if yours so ill then maybe head to bed my friend.

Ive seen the lowest of the lowell oh well
I guess they called me jack karouac
But i dont wanna write like jack karouac
And looking back the way i dealt with all of that
Is spitting out the truth from this poets new almanac

Get Outta Town

Get Outta Town! (Bandcamp)

Get Outta Town! (Soundcloud)

Prof. Mayfly and Subtle Keystrokes craft a psychedelic journey through the nethers of a poetic consciousness. A combination of soothing, calming reflective, devotional and ambient sounds, a tinge of hip hop, and a torrent of poetry.

The albums thematic focus is on the attributes and associated feelings with taking big risks in life and moving into a new chapter of growth, Made for quiet introspection the suggested listening style is alone with headphones or in the car on a long drive. A PDF booklet with lyrics and associated artwork for all tracks is included for anyone who downloads the album on bandcamp. If you enjoy this album please share it, and follow me on bandcamp soundcloud twitter instagram or all of the above

thank you and happy listening

Fabricated Flight (1/10th)

(Featured image is of Peter Brughels – Fall of Icarus)

(Image in Soundcloud link is an original)

Fabricated Flight is a poem and song inspired by the tale of Icarus, it is a reflection of my sense of self worth and my perception of my goals. Please enjoy and Share (Lyrics/Poem Below link)

 

What do you wanna fly?

Fuck manners I’ve waited my turn.
No instructions so how could you learn.
I will drape myself in this weight like a lead cape.
Steel skin rusting, fussing is part of the art.
I put myself together by first falling apart.
And my attentions been of the charts.
Honing in to that bullseye like throwing a dart.
Which states of the art? Because I’ll move there happily.
And watch that whole world trail on after me.

<Chorus>

(Because I’m mad zen maybe nine times out of ten, but 1/10ths still 3 days a month that it all comes undone and I let my mouth run.
Some guys trust the guise of the blue skies
Some folks only focus on the on their dead hopes. While I?
Man, I strive for that Icarus kiss of the sky if I could fly for a moment in time then Its fine…And I don’t give a fuck how peter Brugheul paints me.)

At least I made wings y’all didn’t make anything. I guess that was Daedelus, I asked my dad he just told me to snap out of it. Because he’s seen me like this before sure. In all types of light but even In the light of love I’m still the writing type Im still the fighting type but see I put my fist down now I don’t care if you don’t like my type.

Because
Your blanket statements won’t keep you warm.
The humans being man thats just a form
These prescriptions won’t cure the symptoms
When some addictions are to the core
There’s gotta be more(x4)
So I move on down the coast just to b-more
And it’s gonna be so so raven
But I’m more of a crow tho with my flow yo so cloaked like Frodo I’m baggin it up…
and I’m backing it up in my off-road sport LE.
That’s a joke you wouldn’t get unless you know me personally and personally
I think the measure of a man is what his word can reach.
True liberation through a verb curved purposely.
Cursing or cussing I’m telling you something.
It’s like somebody took the lid off of my hip hop.

And while I’m mad zen …

maybe nine times out of ten, but 1/10ths still 3 days a month that it all comes undone and I let my mouth run.
Some guys trust the guise of the blue skies
Some folks only focus on the on their dead hopes. While I?
Man, I strive for that Icarus kiss of the sky if I could fly for a moment in time then Its fine…And I don’t give a fuck how peter Brugheul paints me.)

And for what?
me and my beats will become more abstract.
No tempo no track no keys and no snaps.
Forgive me I don’t fix my MIDI.
I let the track the stand.
I think inflection is important,
some samples imported but always distorted and filtered or kiltered and everything’s free.

I’m tryna show you how it feels to have steel wings strapped to a feather weight.
Tell me don’t jump. I’m to stubborn for your better way.
Never crushed like a rubber man.
I’m luffy or luffy aloof but you’ll love me. And either way I’m in one piece.
The sea is so vast and fabricated But as it ripples and rides
I don’t worship the waves man I worship tides
And as they’re passing me by
I don’t worship ships but I worship the size
And the keels
hold it together man hold it together man.

So far, from typical thoughts have spawn pitiful. I believe in my core, endured principles.
And yo it’s funny, because I don’t care about the money.
But understand that demanding respect.
Often translates to the size of your check.
To that I effect I’ll never break my neck
except for natures debt, which I accept.
I feel truly indebted to.
Thank the world which has raised fed, bedded and embedded me.

I just really want to be influential, essentially essential to the world through intention.
From papers, inventions and honorable mentions.
Man of the Renaissance, or at least to that effect, read aloud in my epitaph.

Man I can’t help but laugh when I think of that. It makes me happy in a deep place.

So you can save face, it’s true that I take hate graciously. Try to keep pace with me and you’ll find your mind hating me.
But I accept love spaciously and patiently.
When I say stay with me, I mean mentally mystically spiritually artistically,
I don’t give a shit about visually or sexually.
So perplexed by me you’ll feel detest for me.
Even the lift of flight comes off that downward push and look.
I would risk my life, absorb spite in this dormant light.
For just a second at the northern lights.
Because even through the quirks and the irksome.
Even through the filth and the boredom.
Even through the hate and and rejection despite the infection.
And all these irrational assholes, tangled in their own awareness. I don’t care it’s.
Still so beautiful to be alive.
So that’s why I’m done trusting majority because it occurred to me falling from the sky that this was all I’d ever really wanted But I still didn’t see me going like this.

This is what I do.

When the shit hits the fan there are two types of people, they ones who look for cover and the ones who stand to face the fire. Cover’s better, but this is what i do…

(Listen link on the bottom)

This is what I do

What’s wrong with me, nobody seems to ever wanna get along with me. Long live greed. Nobody seems to really deem me smart and keen. Too silly this will make me sick, nick nice trick, got a rock I could skip? I’d love to watch the ripple triple until settling on the shore. Life’s a scam a one way scan, nobodies impressed with my heartfelt impression, my heart felt the fenced in feeling of a really tight cage no way. By the grace of god, this life taste so odd. Can you face the odds? can you face the odds? Prod by the rod this from the sky to the sod. It never really stops

proud prodigals system made inaudible, improbable prophet, stop it, why you always gotta make yourself out to be the hot shit, locking all the demons in a closet. Well watch this, because this is what I do.

WHATS WRONG WITH ME.

Straight cursed, feelings overwhelm me from the birth to the herse. Keep listening to voice in head. Voice is that plural? I’ll blur I’ll stir,I’ll Shake I’ll rinse, repeat. Stack my little life on these sheets to complete, the last page. The death of a poet don’t blow it. Lavender lavished my Pasture faster faster, please master send me to the rapture. I feel twisted, contoured captured plastered.

Tragically alone, that’s how the orphans and the bastard feel. That’s how the the mentors and the masters feel, that’s how the king in the castle feels. How the Saints and the asshole feels. We’re are looking for the same damn thing, because the truth is we never really understood anything. And how could we?

I act so goody goody but there’s fire in my blood I can’t quench it, and Fuck it I don’t want to. Fuck If i don’t want you. Fog on window makes it’s easy to believe. It’s just me, so everything and everyone’s a figment of reality. Relax,don’t pull that thread, remembering what sensei said about the garden. Pardon, remembering what men might say about my hardened shroud and my sword and shield.

This rabbit hole doesn’t really need to end.

I’m finally finalizing all of my faults fabricating falling in the false field of view. Fantasizing, fundamentally relinquishing my youth. Functioning to fight for the truth, too ruthless. The truth is, nah that’s stupid. I’m the one who’s made me feel this lucid. I can’t believe that I forgot that I could do this. Permanent and prudent, feelings so precious so please don’t test this. Mayflys not a deity to mess with, my hands get antsy heart gets restless. Autopsy shows a brain that’s impressed with a mess full mayflys, fly away for the day little bug eyes

https://soundcloud.com/subtle-keystrokes/this-is-what-i-do

What it is like to be human

Some spoken word you can listen to at this link and read through below…

https://soundcloud.com/subtle-keystrokes/what-it-is-like-to-be-human

I swear I’ll never understand the way that people treat me, it seems they think that if they beat me they may beat me. But you could never understand I don’t want to force my hand. I’m here, and anger is so exhausting. Besides our air is plumed enough by fumes from all the yester years. My fear is that it’s too late, that all of this is in vein and that my madness isn’t as beautiful as I’ve made it out to be…. hmph (>_<)

Well time and time again I’ve seen my compassion viewed as a weakness. I harbor all my strength here so I think that’s weird. It’s strange I accept that pain though, it’s almost comforting in a way because it reminds me that I too am a human. A costume I’ve long felt I was trying my hardest to fit into but just couldn’t get my legs through. Who knows, maybe I have outgrown the sanctity of skin but then again I may just be arrogant. I’ll blame it on the air and then refuse to breath. The divine leaves the door open for me but won’t allow me to leave, or I’m delusional, but that’s the way I’ve seen it as far back as I can render. So who’s to say what’s real besides me, what’s really beside me. I mean half of the time my wide eyes are lying and I really only ride this wave.

I didn’t always, but I truly love me and that’s truly something. Of course I have to remind myself often but what are my other options? I’m not the type to stay up at night wondering where I went wrong. Because I leave it on the table, all of it. I’ll just be trying to make sense out of something that doesn’t. Light that cigarette. Another thing I sanctified crumbles. I keep building. I feel as though this tower is undone the second that the brick and mortar dries.but I keep trying. I didn’t do it for the attention, I just don’t want To be overlooked. A closed book never brokered and my broken throat. I heal all my aliments with a wholesome hope and a perfect note, an everlasting craftsmanship. I want to be allowed to have feelings but I’m scared that they’ll laugh at my blasphemy. I am truly rationing what happens with the amount of stabs to the back that action has for me

Masochist, I’d like to relax but I really never understood half of this pristinely packaged extremely average path to acting like you’re made for some position in society. We are human, we are made to dance not to evaluate the economy. Sustainability and growth are the product of harmony not a stimulus package and an arms race to first place to take a face off. Love is slipping through our fingers. Science is truth but its not all of it. There is the meta, the mental, the truth about soulfulness. The patch of matter where our feelings really matter. If you catch my drift because I’m just floating. You have to believe before you make it anyplace but back to bed and I’m not saying that’s easy. I have an outlet and some days I still feel outed. Some days I still feel my doubt hit me so deep in my gut that I don’t know which way is up. The world is a reflection of our minds, and mine mine. Intentionally fragile so it tastes like throwup in my mouth and understand I can’t fix the world on my own but I am trying: maybe if I enlist the list of apparitions that I’ve been kin with. Who am I kidding they enlist me. I mostly just listen, but never head advice. I chose to only ever learn the hard way in this life. So I am strong now and I know this very close to my center. I am the world so I will never venture alone. The same goes for you, let it out. It is ok to be human…

 

 

Blank Page

Blank page (I’ll probably write a song to boot)
I love the feeling of a white page

Blank face, lately they’ve been saying that the blank page, hasn’t been acting rightly might lay might rage might slip so I bite lip, Doctor keep spitting that lipshit weary of the really tight grips too zen well then. What am I left to tell them?

Hell friends here’s my pitch, warm up your bullpen
Full pen tenements 

Childish for the hell of it 

Anger makes the venom relevant, resonant

Can not believe the risk of a brittle pith little kids

Check out just how this frequency speaks to me rather decently, so recently decided this poetry could happen I should try it is my passion

Within reason and ration and time

And this could take a while.

So I’ll get more degrees like global averages 

Professor isn’t in my name by accident

I guess truthfully I love math because it’s poetic 

It’s Fourier own good 

Now that’s matched to the infinite harmonic of your reasoning… Imagine?!

If we could see the way that thoughts happen?

That’s hilarious, I don’t even care if I write fairly good or barely good.

I wrote the truth exactly the way it came to me

The only way I understood 

 

Forever venom

 

This is unjust Vilification of my clearly unsanctioned and non-vanilla statements. But it’s clear as a painting the world needs more words and this drunken poet is blatant yet impatient. This is my portion, that’s not rational. You’re still forcing this up my nose like an adderall. And after all it was a satin fall off the wall. It was a tune whistled to amuse the crew, and I was perched on my seat. You’d been visiting, and you know me well. So well enough that time will tell you tell me off I say oh well you can keep yours to yourself. I’ve seen the leaves fall, so don’t act like I bathe in privilege I’ve lived through all my rivets all the insults all the hits and all the love that was dismissive. And I promise, no one ever falls apart from drunk word vomit. No one ever changes from the Arctic to the tropic from a comment. See red if you want to but it’s still unfair. They always treat me like the air, never notice that I’m there yet quick to comment on repair. Spread thin on brimstone the fluid dark… the mark of a mad man dancing to his own tune blinded by the rustling foliage dancing in its stillness along the city streets. I was just confused as usual. Forever venom from my restless tongue, I’m sorry